You crossed the Rainbow Bridge yesterday, hopefully into the loving circle of the four others in our fur family that went before you. You were the first in and last out of our five fur kids. I knew you would be the most complex to let go, since you and I have been together half my life. 18 1/2 years is a good long run for the runt Calico with a big mouth and even bigger attitude.
My milk went unmolested this morning, but I won’t miss cleaning a cat box. I got no chin snuggles last night, but I also didn’t have to give you iv fluids to keep your elder body hydrated. I won’t have anyone to share my Cheetos with today, or to loudly greet me when I come home, as if my leaving was some sort of personal offense to you. I’ve certainly never had a cat that talked so much. Ever. Or yelled. But I won’t miss vet bills. The conflicted emotions of not needing now to honor the promise I made to you when you were eight weeks old, that I would fiercely love, worship, and protect you to the bitter end, cause me guilt, pain, relief, sorrow…… And as I wander around this now empty house gathering all of your things to put in the attic, I see. A paw under the bathroom door, a twitching tail baiting the dog, a thundering herd of one tearing through the dining room, a lonely laundry basket, and 18 1/2 years of my life well, well worth living with you. Mama loves.